'Bout time

So I finally ran into some trouble. It was, I'm sure we can all agree, only a matter of time. Last night at the beach house I was innocently watching a documentary about a child abducting homicidal maniac on Staten Island when I heard the distinct radio-chatter of official inquiry outside the van (this was around 11). Ever pro-active, I popped my head out, assuming it was me and my enormous, hideous (mostly) green van (Bubba, after much deliberation) that they were interested in, as indeed it was.

They wanted to know what I was doing (I wish I knew), and so I told them, with as much honesty as I could muster, that I was doing... nothing; that my dogs were inside; that they were a lab mix and a pit bull (who was watching TV); and that no, I was not - so far as I knew - on America's Most Wanted. They informed me that it was not, unfortunately, legally permissible to sleep in one's vehicle.

(Now. I would be lying if I said that I was surprised by this information. However. Outside of Barnes & Noble the other day I happened to witness a small police action and when it was over I accosted one of the straggling officers with calls of "Hey! Mr. Police Dude!" When I got his - not entirely thrilled - attention, I asked him whether or not it was legal to... yes, to sleep in one's vehicle. He told me that it was. I was surprised. And pleased. It was with this information in mind that I abandoned my plan to move my car from place to place at night in an effort to avoid unnecessary and unwelcome attention. The street I'd grown most fond of was Charlotte St., because there's an unsecured Wifi signal in the area and this was allowing me to watch Netflix on my iPad before going to sleep. I was still moving the car during the day, but I returned each night to the same general area, expecting to draw an eventual police interaction, but also expecting that I would be left alone once it had been determined that I wasn't scoping out potential opportunities for theft.)

When I told the inquiring officer of the information I'd gathered, he told me that while my information might be correct in the city of Wilmington, it was not correct in the city of Wrightsville Beach. Again, I wasn't surprised. The houses in the area aren't all mansions, but I'm sure they're all extravagantly expensive, and I can only imagine that the owners do not want homeless people parking their Bubbas in their front yards.

So I was told that I was more than welcome to park in the area; to use the beach and what-have-you, but that I couldn't sleep there. So I moved. (First I walked the dogs, then I used the free Wifi for an hour - just to draw out my presence a bit.) I drove to the mall where I've been camping during the day, patronizing both Starbucks and the aforementioned Barnes & Noble. I drove around the lot, knowing that (bizarrely) there are apartments in the complex and that there might therefore be overnight parking. What I found was a back lot filled to the brim with cars. The lot was near the movie theater, but it was midnight, and there were so many cars, I assumed they weren't all theater patrons. I don't know if I was correct in that assumption, but at 9:30 the following morning I got a knock on the van. Security. No, I was not allowed to park in their lot overnight. Private property and the like. He had been going to tow the van, but the dogs... Anyway, he was very nice (asked me if I was homeless and while technically the answer to that is either yes or no, I told him I was on the road, effectively avoiding the question), but still, I can't park there overnight. He had seen my van around for the last week or so, etc., etc. Still not surprised. This is a problem I anticipated from the earliest stages of my VanPlan. We parted on good terms.

Later in the day, returning to Starbucks after a short walk, I saw him lingering in the vicinity of the van. Apparently there have been complaints about my taking up customer parking. "But I am a customer" I whined. He knows that; I'm fine; but if I'm just hanging out in the van, I should park it "over there", in the back of the lot. There's also a nice area back there to walk the dogs. Also, if anyone bothered me, he said, let them know that we'd spoken and that I was behaving appropriately; was a paying customer, etc., and he gave me his card.

I like him.

He likes me, too.

He also likes my dogs.

I like my dogs, too.

You meet nice people on the road, even if they are telling you to beat it.

Tomorrow I'm going to do some recon. Gotta find a new home. I'm not giving up on the beach, though. South of here there are a lot more beaches. I'll play it safe this time. I don't need internet. When you're homeless, you learn to do without.

I haven't showered in 2 weeks.