So last night I went back to the beach. Not to sleep, just to walk the dogs, and maybe a little bit to shove Bubba in the faces of the rich. What? You're surprised that I'm petty and childish? Please. So, it worked.
I took the dogs for a long walk - about a mile down the beach - and when I got back to the van (parked exactly where I'd been parking it all last week), there were... wait for it... four cop cars waiting for me, and one crazy-looking under-cover SUV full of what looked to me like surveillance equipment. Jesus Christ.
I put the dogs in the van (not yet completely sure they were there for me - just pretty sure) and one of the cops walked up and asked me for ID. I gave him the license I'd picked up that morning from the post office and told him that they'd been down talking to me a couple of nights ago. He walked away with my license while another cop cooed over the dogs (who were, thank God, behaving). Half a minute later he came back, returned my ID, told me to have a nice night and formed a huddle with the other cops, each confirming that they were satisfied that all was well. I left, happy to have disturbed the peace in my own peaceful way.
I think I'll go back tonight. Maybe I'll take up night fishing. I hear it can be very relaxing.
I think the mistake you're clearly making is not distributing baked goods to your new neighbors. I'm not saying everybody loves a zucchini bread(or needs the calories... am I right?!? Ha!) but I think a little "Welcome (me) to the neighborhood" gift would go a long way in smoothing things over... I've made a habit of calling the cops whenever anybody new moves into my neighborhood and fails to come to my house bearing a box of delicious sugary treats and two forms of government identification... so please, PLEASE go ring some doorbells with a smile on your face and a bag of muffins in your hand... please.
ReplyDelete-Your Sister